


For My Son

by DragonsFeather



Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Angst, Drama, Family, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-30
Updated: 2012-04-26
Packaged: 2017-11-02 18:51:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/372201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonsFeather/pseuds/DragonsFeather
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After taking out a group of slavers in Lowtown, Hawke and his friends find a very young slave. He decides to take care of him for a moment, but his growing affection for this young boy will change his plan, and more...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Done for a request on DA Kink Meme, I decided to post it here. It will be a long story. :)  
> The story begins between Act 2 and 3, one year after the Qunari attack. So, Isabela does not appear in the first chapters.  
> It will eventually become M!Hawke x Fenris. Rating will also go up in later chapters.

“TO ARMS!”

“I see... They will never learn, won't they?”

“I don't think it really matters, Hawke!”

The rogue couldn't agree more as several men came out of their hiding place, swords and daggers drawn, ready to get ride of the intruders. Considering the abrupt call given just as he entered the warehouse with his friends, talks and negotiations were out of questions. Varric had been right about his trail on slavers.  
He wasted no time and took his daggers in hands, just as Aveline and Fenris walked ahead of him, swords out.

“Looks like I was right again, Hawke!” said his dwarven friend as he loaded his crossbow and started firing at archers that were aiming at them.

“I never doubted it!” He replied before joining in the fight. It wasn't the first time that they took out slavers in Lowtown. Their activities had been on a rise since the Qunari attack. Something that did not surprise Aveline. Even now, one year after the attack, Kirkwall's population was still learning to close the wounds. Especially in Lowtown and the Harbor quarters. Harmless places for slavers.  
It wasn't hard for Hawke to convince Aveline to let him come to help. Stating that being the Champion of Kirkwall, the population would appreciate to see him helping the City guards. Of course, the Guard-Captain didn't believe he was doing this out of his good heart, but he didn't care much...

“I owe you a beer!”

“Quit joking Hawke!” Aveline said before decapitating a slaver. Hawke winced faintly, hoping she didn't imagine him at his place, before throwing his dagger into a slaver's back. Fenris just stayed silent, fighting the remaining slavers with a true rage. Nothing could motivate the elf more than killing slavers. The rogue knew it and thus, it wasn't difficult to convince the elf to come with him.  
It was also a good excuse to spend time with his former lover... even if they weren't alone.

“I think that was the last one.” Varric said after the last man fell on the ground. “Well done, isn't it?”

“That was... brief but clean.” Hawke said with a shrug. “If spilling blood can be considered as clean... but I expected more resistance.”

“Indeed...” Aveline said “But Hawke, I'd appreciate if you-”

“Hold.” The trio all looked at Fenris, who just held out his hand to the group, looking around with a frown. “I can feel something... foul.”

“Like what?” Hawke asked walking over. “Fenris, what's going-”

“Look out!” The rogue didn't have time to react before the elf pushed him violently on the ground. As he fell on his back, he heard a crashing noise on his right, and Aveline calling Fenris's name. He opened his eyes in time to see Varric bending down to help him on his feet and... seeing Fenris on the other side of the room in the middle of crashed wooden crates. He wasn't moving anymore.

“Fenris!” He said worriedly as he stood up. Varric took his crossbow back in hands and nodded at Aveline.

“Troubles ahead!” Sure enough, the rogue could see at a few feet a man dressed in dark robes, coming out of a room on the other side of the warehouse. Just like his arms and hands, the floor was crimson with blood. He started chanting and waving his hands as shades appeared around him. Aveline rushed past the rogues, her sword and shield in hands. Hawke knew he had to go and fight the maleficar as well, but he also wanted to help Fenris. Making sure he was alright. “Fenris, answer me!”

“Move it, Hawke!” Aveline called as she blocked a shade's attack. “Help would be welcome!”

“Right!” Reluctantly, he cast one last worried look at the fallen elf before joining her, directly aiming at the mage who dared hurting him...

****

“ _Vishante_...” The elf grumbled as he opened his eyes. His head felt light, his vision was blurring and a hissing noise was giving him a serious headache. He started to move, slowly sitting up. His limbs felt heavy, his skin tender, and he could also feel the hot feeling of blood streaming down his face. The blood magic attack had been violent, but Fenris didn't care. He still had enough strength to fight.

“Fenris!” He winced faintly at the loud voice that belonged to the blurry figure sitting down in front of him. “Ah, sorry... I'll keep it down.”

“It will be much appreciable, Hawke...” the elf mumbled, as he looked up. As much as he could see, Hawke didn't seem wounded. He was safe. He felt both relieved and angry that the same time. The fool man didn't see the attack coming. Thank the Maker he pushed him out of the way in time.  
If said-Maker did exist.  
He blinked and breathed slowly as the hissing noise slowly faded away. The blur slowly disappeared as well, revealing the human rogue holding a potion with a red liquid inside. A healing potion. “I'm fine, Hawke. This mage...”

“Dead. Here, take this. It will help.”

“It is not necessary, Hawke.” Fenris said, frowning at the potion. “As I said, I am-”

“You drink or I make you drink it. Your choice.” The rogue replied, waving the bottle in front of the elf's face with a frown. “And I won't take 'no' as an answer, Fenris. You wouldn't want your pretty face to remain in this state, would you? Or maybe I should bring you to Anders. I'm _sure_ he'll be _delighted_ to help you. Then-”

“Fine.” The elf glared at him before snatching the potion from the man's hand. Anything, if it meant that the man would shut up. Removing the cork, he saw him smiling. “Stop this.”

“Stop what?”

“Smiling like that.” he said, bringing the small phial to his lips. “It's...”

“ _The man's smile was breathtaking, and the fallen elf could feel a shiver going up his spine. How could someone look so handsome? He was beginning to wonder if he was still dreaming..._ ” Fenris almost chocked on the potion as he heard Varric. The dwarf was standing near them with a grin, gently wiping the blood that spilled on Bianca during the fight. “What? I still have a book to finish. Anything can help.”

“I didn't need to hear this...” Fenris mumbled before finally swallowing the potion. He could feel the wounds closing, his head didn't feel so light anymore. But now he could feel his cheeks heating up. Damn dwarf...  
Before Varric could reply, a cough interrupted them. Hawke looked a bit flushed as he stood up, rubbing the back of his head.

“Well, anyway, we... we're done, here, aren't we?”

“Leave the rest up to the guards.” Aveline said, walking over. “I will go back to... what's this?”

Aveline stopped talking and frowned. No one asked her what was wrong, because they could all hear it: light footsteps, close to them. Fenris took his great-sword and stood up slowly, followed by Hawke. He couldn't feel the foul blood magic in the air anymore. It couldn't be a mage. They all stayed quiet for a moment, and then the sound of small footsteps started again. The group stayed silent, trying to spot where it came from. But whoever was still in the warehouse, they weren't careful enough to be quiet. More like in a hurry to get away.  
Fenris wouldn't have it. If a slaver was still here, then this place would become his grave.  
When the foot steps stopped, Fenris showed no hesitation. He knew exactly where to look.

“Fenris?” He heard Hawke saying behind him as he walked toward two large wood crates. His weapon firmly in his hands, he kicked the crates out of the way, ready to hit whoever was hiding behind.  
What he didn't expect to see was a child. A male elven child, whose eyes widened in terror at his sight. The boy screamed in fear.

“Mama!!!” Too stunned to act, Fenris watched as the child crawled away from him, and cowered in a corner. He was trembling badly and crying.

“Oh Maker...” Just as he lowered his sword, he heard Hawke running toward him, followed closely by Aveline and Varric. All of them stayed silent as they saw the child. He was dressed in badly worn gray clothes, small and frail tanned arms wrapped around his head in a poor attempt to protect himself.

“Now, that... was not expected.” Varric said behind him. “I didn't know there was any slave here.”

“Let me.” Fenris looked at Hawke, who stepped forward, his face carefully blank, before kneeling at a few feet from the child. “Hey... hello there. The bad men are gone, you're safe now.”

Hawke's voice was very soft, gentle. Fenris wasn't sure if he'd get the child to relax, considering what happened a few minutes before. But the way Hawke was talking... it was soft and relaxing. He hadn't heard Hawke talking like that since...  
The warrior frowned faintly, trying to banish these thoughts from his mind. It was not the right time for this. It was the past, anyway.  
Sighing very lowly, he watched as Hawke kept talking to the boy. The child wasn't moving for a moment, his head still buried in his arms.

“I'm here to help you, little one.” Hawke continued. “Look at me... please.”

For a moment, there was still no reaction. It took a few minutes before the child finally removed his arms and raised his head. Black hair was falling into his eyes, wide as they looked at Hawke. The trembling wasn't as bad as when Fenris found him. Yet, he still didn't come any closer to the man. The rogue tilted his head.

“Can you understand me?” He asked, the tone of his voice unchanged. The child said nothing for a moment before slowly nodding. “My name is Hawke. And I'm here to bring you to safety. No one can hurt you anymore, I promise.”

Fenris saw the child's gaze shifting to him and the trembling started again. He whimpered, pointing at the warrior, who kept himself from cursing. He had scared him to death with his assumption that it was another slaver hiding, and not a child. He stepped back, knowing that it was not a good idea to stay within the boy's eyesight.

“Elf...” He looked down at Varric, who smiled in sympathy. He had guessed what was going on. “Come on, let's go to the Hanged Man. Hawke and Aveline can deal with it.”

“I...” The words died in his mouth as Aveline looked firmly at Fenris and nodded. It was obvious that leaving was the best option. “... Fine.”

The dwarf nodded and walked pass him. He wasted no time to follow, knowing there was nothing more to do for now. Aveline and Hawke would make sure the child was brought to safety. Strange enough, it reminded him of something... but he couldn't put a finger on it.  
He groaned lowly and stepped outside, hoping the cold air would calm him down... and maybe some wine. If the Hanged Man had any drinkable one...

****

It was a strange relief to know that Fenris was gone. Hawke knew it was necessary. The warrior had unwillingly scared the child badly, thinking he was going to be killed and crying for his mother...  
Aveline had left Hawke's side to check the room where the blood mage had came from. Now, the child looked less scared. He still didn't come any closer to Hawke, but was now looking at him with curiosity.

“Where's mama?” He asked in a small and hesitant voice. The man swallowed with difficulty, not knowing what to answer. Either his mother wasn't here, or... worse.

“I... don't know.” he said gently. “I'm sorry, but... you're the only one here.”

“Mama told me to run when... the bad man...” the child said, shaking again. “He said... he wanted blood.”

“Maker...” Hawke heard Aveline saying from away. She sounded angry. “They... They're all dead, Hawke.”

“Who?” Hawke took his eyes off the child and looked behind him. Aveline came back, her face paler than usual.

“A few men and women... and even a child. Hawke, I think they were the slaves.”

The rogue had to swallow back the bile coming from his stomach. They were all dead... meaning the mage had used their blood to fuel his power... meaning that this child was very likely the only survivor. And now, an orphan.  
He looked back at the child, who was sniffing.

“Mama?” he asked in a small voice. Ignoring the sad sigh behind him, Hawke gently held out his hand to the child, who stared at it.

“Come with me, little one.” he said, still using the same gentle voice. He forced a smile too. A small one. “I promise I will bring you to safety. I won't let anything happen to you.”

He couldn't possibly blame the child to still be scared. He had been in the hands of slavers and after everything that had happened... still, the rogue wanted to try. He couldn't leave this child alone here, nor did he want to force him to get out. The boy had to do it.  
As he waited, he started thinking about how this situation reminded him of his family. Of Bethany and Carver. When they were very young, thunderstorms used to scare them. As their protective elder, he would try to comfort them, holding them at night... especially Bethany. Carver would sometimes pretend to be fine, until a particularly loud thunder would make him scream and join Bethany in their older brother's embrace.  
Such memories... but it was a long time ago. He felt his smile widened sightly, before it disappeared.  
Only memories.

He was brought back to reality as he felt a small hand touching his. He blinked and realized that the young boy was now in front of him, looking very hesitant, wide blue eyes looking at him in curiosity through thick black lock of hair. With a smile, he brought his arms very slowly around the child, as if to give him a chance to back away if he wanted to. But the boy didn't move. He was still shaking faintly, but didn't look like he wanted to run away. With a small nod, he wrapped his left arm around the small boy's back, while the other went under his thighs, gently lifting him up as he stood back up.  
He was small and light... he couldn't possibly more than seven or eight years old.

“Good work, Hawke.” Aveline said as she watched the boy wrapping his frail arms around Hawke's neck, burying his head in it. “What are you going to do?”

“It's very late...” he said, making sure that the boy was comfortable enough in his arms. “I'd bring him to the Chantry, but it's way too late. I will go tomorrow and talk to Sebastian. For now, he'll stay at my house. He could use some food and a bath.”

“I don't think there's anything else you can do, anyway...” Aveline said, sighing softly. “Poor child... let's not linger here any longer. The farther you take him from here, the better he will be.”

The rogue couldn't agree more as he followed her out of the warehouse. He stopped as he stepped outside, feeling the boy tightening his hold, shivering briefly. The air wasn't exactly warm tonight. The child was instinctively seeking body heat.

“Don't worry, I'm going to bring you home.” Hawke gently whispered as he tried to hurry to go back to Hightown. He didn't even look if Aveline was behind him. All he cared was to bring the boy to his house.  
He paused briefly when he realized he didn't even know his name, before keeping on walking. It would be for later. Right now, all he wanted was to make sure the child would be safe...


	2. Chapter 2

Fenris knew he shouldn't have drunk so much. Even if Varric offered him the drinks. Obviously, he was going to have a very hard time getting back to his mansion tonight... even if it wasn't exactly _his_ mansion.

“Now, that's the frown that says _what am I doing_ , isn't it? Or is it the _I'm drunk_ one?”

“Will you ever make sense with your... nonsense, dwarf?” the elf said, turning to Varric. The dwarf was still sitting on his usual chair at the end of the table, smiling.

“Trust me, elf, I've seen you brooding for everything and nothing. But this kind of brooding clearly show that you are disturbed by something.”

“I-”

“Do not brood, of course!” Varric chuckled. “Don't play this game with me, you cannot fool me.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You didn't mean to scare that kid. But it's alright. I bet you've scared a lot more people. I don't see why you're so affected by that.”

“It's not...” Fenris sighed, resting his head on the palm of his hand. “I've been reckless. I assumed whoever was still there had to be another slaver. But...”

“But?”

“You said you didn't know there were slaves... and yet this one was there. A child. Slavers don't bother with only one slave.”

“Well, they do with you.” The dwarf held up his hands as Fenris glared at him. “Now, now, I know you're a special kind and he's just a kid, but... what's your point?”

“He was probably the only survivor.” Edwina arrived in Varric's private suite, carrying a mug of beer. The warrior snatched it from her and proceeded to drink, ignoring her look of annoyance. He slammed it down the table as Varric gently waved her away. “What will become of him, now? He can't possibly survive on his own.”

“Hawke will probably think of something.” The dwarf said, leaning back on his chair. “You shouldn't worry about it. Don't forget Orana. She used to be a slave, and but now is working for him. As a servant.”

“As if I could forget that day...” The elf mumbled, remembering the feeling of his fingers curling around Hadriana's heart and crushing it, Hawke's attempt at comforting him, and... everything. He sighed, gulping down the rest of his beer. “You sound like he may keep this boy as well.” Fenris said, shaking his head. “A new servant? This is ridiculous.”

“I didn't say he'd keep him. But really, Fenris, you're getting drunk for no reason. Are you sure there's nothing you're keeping from me and Bianca?”

“That's none of your business.”

Varric shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest as he watched the drunk elf, who was now visibly trying not to fall asleep right here. He couldn't say that trying to understand Fenris was easy business. More like a helpless one. It seemed that only Hawke could see through the thick spikes of this angsty porcupine. A real challenge.  
That wasn't going to make things easier either. He wasn't blind, and had watched more than once Hawke trying to get the elf's attention again since this... famous night, last year. He had warned his friend, but the human was a fool.  
A fool in love.  
Varric was just stuck at the place of spectator, watching this sad show about love and foolishness. But Hawke was a grown man, an adult who could make his own decisions. He just hoped there would be a happy ending...

“I should go back...” He was brought out of his thoughts as he heard the elf pushing his chair back and standing up. He tried to walk toward the door, but his steps were clearly unsteady.

“Elf, maybe you should stay here for the night?”

“In this dirty place? No thanks.” Fenris said before hiccuping.

“As if your mansion full of dust was any better!” The elf turned around and looked at him... or at least, tried to. “... Fine, I got it. But I'll bring you back to your home.”

“I don't need your charity.”

“I just really don't feel like telling Hawke that I let you leave the Hanged Man as a mess. Especially if someone find you the next morning with only your underwear on and vomiting on your way up to the Chantry.” He said, standing up and walking to Fenris.

“... What kind of nonsense is that?”

“The kind a writer says when he's fed up dealing with a drunk elf. Now, let's go.” 

********

The night was mostly quiet, save for some drunk people Hawke met on his way back home. It wasn't like he wouldn't be able to beat them of they were being aggressive, but the man wanted to avoid troubles and get back to the mansion.  
Thankfully, none of them really paid attention to them, but he could feel the boy tensing in his arms each time one would look at them. Hawke would whisper not to worry, assuring him that they'd soon be at a safe place, and the child would somehow relax.  
Somehow.

Hawke couldn't blame him. The boy would probably have nightmares on what had happened tonight. He sure did when his own mother had died in his arms last year...  
Sighing faintly, he shook his head, not wanting to think about this terrible day, and soon reached his mansion. He gently set the boy down on the ground, who quickly grabbed his arm, holding it tightly.

“It's alright, now.” He said with a faint smile, before leading him inside. The lights were still on, indicating that, at least, someone was still up. “I'm back!”

“Ah, messere! I hope you had a good- oh! You have a little guest?” Bodhan looked at the elven boy with surprise as Hawke arrived with him.

“Hello!” Sandal said with his usual grin. Orana, who had been watering the plants, just looked at the boy with wide eyes.

“Sort of...” The rogue said as he looked down. The child looked nervously at the two dwarfs before wrapping his arms around the rogue's legs. “We rescued him and... well, I'll bring him to the Chantry tomorrow. He will stay here for tonight.”

“I understand. Oh, poor boy.” Bodhan walked over and looked at the frightened child. “Would you like me to prepare something to eat for him?”

“Yes, please do.” He said, nodding as the eldest dwarf and his son both left for the kitchen. “Orana, can you-”

A little scream startled him and the elven servant. They looked down and saw the boy quickly hiding behind Hawke, looking frightened as the rogue's mabari stepped closer, looking at the child with sheer curiosity. He had come down the stairs when he had heard his master coming home.

“Jep, don't scare our guest!” Hawke said to his dog, who simply sat down, his eyes still on the boy. “Don't worry, young one. It's just my dog. He may look a bit intimidating, but he can be a real puppy when he's in the mood.”

As if to prove Hawke's point, Jep playfully rolled on his back before sitting up, panting happily and wagging his short tail. The boy still looked at him warily for a moment, before slowly stepping from behind Hawke.

“Pu... puppy?” He tried tentatively as he looked at Jep, who barked in answer before stepping closer and licking the boy's cheek. He was big enough to reach his head. “Ew! Drool!”  
Hawke chuckled and looked as Orana stepped closer. “Ah, Orana! Will you please draw him a bath? He has had a hard night and could use one.”

“Of course, master.” Orana looked genuinely surprised at the child and then at Hawke. “If I may ask... do you want me to help him for the bath? I know how to do it. And the bathtub us not exactly fit for such a little boy.”

“Are you sure it won't be a bother?”

“Of course not, Master!” The servant said with a little smile. “It would be a pleasure for me to help.”

“Mmm...” Hawke went on his knee beside the boy, who was tentatively petting Jep. Because of the mabari, he didn't seem to have paid much attention to them. He wasn't shaking anymore, though. Now, he looked simply... curious. The boy had obviously never seen a mabari before. “Hey... Orana will give you a bath. And after that you'll have something to eat. Is that alright?”

“Bath and food?” The boy looked at him with surprise. “I... can?”

“Of course.” Hawke said, gently ruffling the boy's hair. To both his surprise and relief, the child didn't flinch at the touch. He could be hard if the boy was afraid of everything. But he clearly seemed to have relaxed. At least, for now. “You're not a slave, boy... I mean... Ah, blast. I don't even know your name.”

“... Selek.” He answered. “My name is Selek.”

“Well, Selek, you're a guest, here. So, we'll treat you like one.” 

“What's a guest?” The boy asked as Hawke stood back up. The rogue chuckled and gently led him to Orana. Though his question remained unanswered, the boy looked surprise as he looked at Orana for the first time. Maybe because she was another elf. “... hello?”

“Hello.” Orana said, before taking his hand. “As master Hawke said, my name is Orana. Come with me, Selek, the bathroom is this way.”

The boy simply followed and both elves went up the stairs. Selek stopped at the top, however, before looking at Hawke with worry. The rogue smiled at him and waved gently.

“Don't worry, I'll still be there once you're done. It's my house, after all.”

The boy nodded and turned to Orana, following her again. As the rogue lost sight of them, he sighed and looked at the fireplace with a frown. What a night. He was used at killing slavers and rescuing people, but taking one of them in his home... and a child? It was a first. But there was no choice. Otherwise, Selek was to be left outside. And he sure wasn't going to let that happen.  
As he started to walk up the stairs, he thought about what he'd have to do tomorrow. He was sure Sebastian would be able to help him. He was one of his closest friends, and he'd be able to give him the information he'd need. The Chantry tried its best to help the people in need. Maybe they'd be able to take him in until they found him a foster family...  
If they found a family willing to adopt an elven child.

He paused as he entered his bedroom. A family adopting an elven child... he couldn't possibly see this happening in Hightown. Most nobles were so full of themselves, they'd probably never accept a non-human child.

“Come on, they're not all that bad...” he whispered to himself as he got his finery clothes out of the closet to get changed and removed his armor. He had been in enough noble parties since he became the Champion to know that some nobles did not treat their elven servants badly. But to the point of adopting an elven child?  
He doubted the people in Lowtown would adopt him as well, considering the struggle the town was still going through since the Qunari attack... he doubted it would work.  
So... the orphanage might be the only solution.

Except if...

“No...” he whispered as he finished to get his clothes on. “This is...”

A knock interrupted his thoughts, followed by Bodhan's voice. “Messere?” He heard “I'll be warming up some hot porridge, and also got bread and fresh water.”

“Perfect.” Hawke said, opening the door of his bedroom. “He's probably starving...”

“I don't doubt it as well.” The dwarf said with a smile before going down the stairs. As the man started to follow, he stopped as he saw his mabari Jep sitting in front of the bathroom door. It seemed like he was waiting patiently for Orana and Selek to come out.

“So... Selek really gets your attention, right?” The mabari tilted his head, looking at him. “I thought so... but he's only staying here for the night. Don't grow found of him. It's only the five of us in this house.”

As he said this, he looked at the bathroom door, thinking. The house didn't have many guests, aside from his friends. But no child. Was it a surprise that his dog was curious about Selek? No, clearly not.  
Considering he had grown up with not-so-quiet twins, the rogue also understood. Sometimes, he did miss the energy of youngsters filling a home. Seeing a child running around, faking screams of terror as their older brother chased them with a laugh... Laughs that would soon be joined by those of his sister or brother... their parents looking at them faking annoyance, but barely managing to suppress their smiles.

A little brother who would mock anger when his eldest caught him... A little sister who would openly said how she loved him, saying he was her favorite big brother... much to her twin's annoyance.

A mother who, despite her constant fear of seeing her daughter and husband being taken one day by templars, found happiness by watching her children wearing bright smiles...

A father saying to his eldest that one day, he'd make a good father... 

A bark brought him out of his thoughts. He looked down at Jep, who whined questioningly at him. For how long had he been standing there? He pinched the bridge of his nose, shutting his eyes firmly. Maker, he had to be tired to get lost in thoughts like this.  
When he opened his eyes again, he saw that the bathroom door was open. Orana came out of it, followed by Selek... who was now wearing one of his old shirt that was way too big for him and falling down to his knees. Even with the sleeves being rolled up.  
His sightly-wet black hair also looked a bit shorter than before.

“Master...” Orana said, looking at the boy. Selek was looking at him with curiosity again. “His clothes were so dirty, I'll need to clean them. So I gave him one of your old shirts. I also cut his hair. There were tangles here and there.”

“Ah...” Hawke forgot about the clothes. There was no child cloth here, so he hadn't thought about this. “You did well. I'll ask Bodhan to buy some new clothes for him tomorrow. For now, he'll have dinner.”

Selek was now in a better shape. He looked so small in his shirt though... new clothes were highly necessary. He wasn't going to let him wear his old rags again.  
His tan skin was now free of dirt, and Orana had cut his now-combed hair pass his pointed ears. Black bangs were falling just above his big blue eyes, which stared at him.

“Food?” He asked timidly as Hawke walked to the boy with a smile and a nod.

“As promised. You're hungry right?” He said, holding out his hand. A loud rumble coming from the boy's stomach was the answer. Selek lowered his head as he took the rogue's hand, who just chuckled. “Don't worry, it's alright.”

“I liked the bath.” Selek said, following him. “Miss Orana helped me to be clean. She's very nice.”

“I'm only doing my work.” Orana said as she followed them. A faint smile on her face betrayed her contentment at the compliment, though. Once they reached the bottom of the stairs, Jep smelled the air and quickly went into the kitchen, followed by Orana who was calling for him not to touch the guest's dinner.  
Hawke and Selek were now alone. The boy looked up at the rogue, tilting his head a bit.

“Are you...” He started, hesitating.

“Am I...?” The rogue said, encouraging the boy to continue.

“Are you really... a human?” The question confused the rogue a bit. He blinked before slowly nodding.

“Of course I am, Selek. Shouldn't I be?” he asked gently, not wanting the boy to think that the question might be seen as offensive or idiotic. He went on his knees, looking at him kindly.

“I... have only known bad humans. They hurt Mama.” He said sadly as he looked down. “They said we were slaves. Dirt. But you...”  
He looked at Hawke with a little smile. “You... you're kind to me. Like Mama.” 

The rogue wasn't sure if it were the boy's words, or the gentle tone of his voice, or both, that made his heart aching sightly. He felt like wanting to kill those slavers again for having done this to Selek and his mother.  
But the kind words... He had gotten compliments before, but coming from an innocent being like Selek... somehow it touched him more. He wasn't sure why, but it did.  
He gave him a smile, gently ruffling the boy's black hair.

“Mama told me to never lie. That lying was bad.” Selek continued. “These bad men were... bad. But you're not. You're kind.”

“Thank you, Selek. It really touches me. I may be kind, but so are you. You're a very kind boy.” He said, standing up. “Now, let's eat a little. Before Jep eats everything. He can be a bad puppy, chewing on every food he found.”

For the first time, Selek let out a short giggle, making the rogue smiling even more. He started walking him to the living-room when a knock interrupted them. Someone was at the door. He gently urged the boy to join Bodhan and Sandal, before walking alone toward the front door. He stopped for a moment, wondering who it could be.  
Maybe Aveline. He had been so focused on getting Selek to his home that he had ignored her since they had left the warehouse.  
Before he could say something, a familiar voice rang out from behind the door.

“Hawke! It's Varric! I've a... _special package_ for you.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to be longer, but work has kept me busy lately.   
> As you noticed, the pace of the story is going slowly for now, but I can't change it for now. I hope nobody mind that. :)

Hawke stayed still for a moment. Varric? He wondered what kind of _special package_ it could be. It had to be important.  
He took the handle of the door and slowly opened the door. Varric was here, with a scowl on his face. And he wasn't alone: a red-faced Fenris was trying to stand still beside him. It didn't take a genius to see that he was drunk. Very drunk.

"What the..." he said to the dwarf, before looking back at Fenris. The elf had his eyes shut, mumbling under his breath. "Fenris? Are you alright?"

"Whyamihere..." He heard the warrior saying. With no warning, Varric walked behind him and slapped him on the back. It wasn't painful, but still hard enough to have him falling forward against Hawke's chest, who quickly grabbed his arms to steady him. "Wha..."

"I planed on taking Broody back to his mansion, but I decided it might be better to bring him to you instead." The dwarf said to answer Hawke's confused look. "In case he gets sick, you'll help him. I don't know why he drank so much, though."

"Why did you let him do that, anyway?"

"Hawke, as far as I know, Broody can make his own decisions."

"I don't think drinking that much can be seen as a good decision, my friend." The man said as he put Fenris's arm around his shoulders, and wrapped his right arm around his slim waist. Varric shook his head.

"I agree, but I didn't leave him on his own. Beside, you can take him in, right?" He said. Fenris just mumbled something unintelligible, his head low. "By the way, where is the kid elf?"

"Selek? He's here. I'll bring him to the Chantry tomorrow." He turned around, making sure his former lover was following him. As drunk as he was, he could still walk. But not without help. "I better take care of Fenris..."

"Yeah... Sorry, Hawke." He paused, turning his head to look at his dwarven friend. Varric did look sorry, and he was sure it wasn't about the child. Was it for letting Fenris drunk to this point? He doubted it. Sighing, the man just shook his head.

"Don't be... thank you for bringing him to me, Varric. I'll see you tomorrow." He said, before walking back inside his mansion and kicking the door shut. Fenris had stopped mumbling, but was having trouble keeping his eyes open. Hawke decided to take care of him without Bodhan's or Orana's help. He preferred to have them taking care of Selek. "Fenris? Listen, I'm going to bring you to bed. You need your rest."

The elf stayed silent, but the rogue didn't really mind. Fenris was not the most talkative guy he knew. With a sigh, he led him toward the steps, where he careful helped him going up. If it was up to him, he'd simply scoop him up in his arms and carry him to his bedroom. But as drunk as he was, he had a feeling that his companion would _not_ appreciate. Either way, the rogue would have to bear with Fenris being so close. The elf's body heat pressed against his side was making his heart swelling and he had to bite back a groan of frustration. He could only hope the elf wouldn't notice anything out of ordinary... if helping the elf while he was drunk wasn't strange enough.

“Maker, help me...” He whispered to himself. Fortunately, the elf seemed more focus on watching his own feet. It took a moment but they finally reached the top of the stairs and Hawke pondered whether to get Fenris in his bedroom or to bring him to the guest one. It was smaller but comfy enough for the elf...  
Or for Selek.  
With a frown, he shook his head and helped Fenris to his bedroom. The little guy would want to be at peace tonight, and not sleep in the same bed as another man, even if said-man had saved his life.   
As for Fenris, Hawke would just need to get up before he do, so that he wouldn't wonder why they were sharing a bed.  
Things were already kind of awkward, the rogue didn't need to make them worse.  
He walked to his bedroom, his pace a little faster. Fenris seemed to slowly fall asleep, and Hawke could feel him slipping from his grip.

“Come on, Fenris, help me...” he said as he moved to sit him on the left side of his bed. Then he reached and unstrapped the great-sword away before walking to the closet and putting it against it. As drunk as the elf was, Hawke wouldn't let him sleep with his weapon and armor on. Just the though made Hawke chuckling a bit. Maybe he should get him something? The elf was slender, no doubt that the rogue's clothes would be too big. But it would be better than nothing.

“Fenris, do you want some-” He stopped as soon as he turned back around: Fenris was now laying on the mattress, his eyes closed. He wasn't making a sound, but his breath was deeper than unusual.  
He had fallen asleep. Still clad in his armor Hawke pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head. No need to count on the elf to get changed.  
He'd have to undress him. “Maker, what a night...”

The rogue didn't want to feel like playing dolls with Fenris a big alive one. But he knew that the elf would surely feel very uncomfortable at sleeping like this and wake up with sore limbs, sooner or later. Finally, he sat next to him and worked on removing his steel claws. He was going slowly, carefully slipping them off his hands before putting them down on the floor.  
Fortunately, the elf was sleeping soundly and unmoving as Hawke worked on each piece of metal. He had a hard time to resist touching the elf's lyrium-scarred fingers, but knew if Fenris woke up and found Hawke touching him in such way, he could get rightfully upset. And the rogue would never take advantages of him. It had taken a long time to win the elf's trust, he didn't want to risk it out of hopeless desire.  
With a frown, he began to remove the elf's bracers and stopped at the one with the red ribbon tied around it. He looked at it for a moment, before taking it off along.  
Fenris had been wearing it since their first night together. As tempting as it had been, Hawke had never told him what this ribbon really was. Its history, its meaning... Fenris had found it on his desk while he had been sleeping. He didn't know it wasn't a simple red ribbon. Maybe Hawke would tell him, if things ever worked out again...  
He shook his head with a frown. Why was he thinking about this now? All that matter was to making sure that Fenris would be fine and go check on Selek. There was no time to think about this.

Once the bracers were gone, he unstrapped both pauldrons and took them off as well. The rogue was impressed that the elf was sleeping still. But his breath was still deep and steady, there was no faking involved. He looked at the chest plate and removed the leathers straps before taking it off, leaving the elf with only his pants and tunic on. After putting everything down on the floor, he stopped for a second, wondering what to do next. He should get the tunic off, but it might be difficult to do without waking the elf up. Or maybe he should just leave it like this. As tempting as it was to see the elf bare-chest again, covered in these fascinating lyrium markings that were reacting to his touch...

"Maker, this is not the right time for this!" he grumbled to himself as he felt his face heating up. He looked at Fenris's face for any sign that he was waking up. But he just heard faint mumbles before the elf's head moved faintly in his sleep. There was a slight frown on his face, his rest disturbed by some nightmare. Hawke hesitated for a moment, before gently brushing a few white locks off Fenris's face. His skin was hot and still flushed. The rogue let his knuckles gently caressing the elf's cheek, before letting his middle finger gently touching his bottom lip for a second. The elf seemed to relax faintly. Hawke couldn't help smiling faintly at the sight. "Sweet dreams, Fenris."

He stood up and took an extra blanket from the closet, before putting it on the sleeping companion. At first, Fenris didn't react before turning on his right side and curling sightly, burying his head into one of the pillows. Hawke had a hard time not to laugh at the cute sight. The fierce warrior could be so adorable. Like a child.  
Thinking of this reminded him of Selek. He wanted to go and see if everything was still alright downstairs.  
Slowly, he made his way to the door and gently closed it behind him, making sure not to make any noise.

When he came back downstairs, he could hear Bodhan talking to someone about porridge, how it was good for his health and to eat slower. A smile crept on his face as he entered the living-room: Bodhan was standing next to the table where Selek was sitting, his legs dangling down and still covered by the very large old shirt. He was happily eating... or rather, gulping down his dinner. He obviously hadn't had a proper meal in days.

"All is well, I assume." Hawke said as he walked over. Selek looked up from his plate, his cheeks puffy, full of porridge. "Do you like it?"

"Yes, ser Hawke. I really do!" The boy answered after swallowing his meal, nodding enthusiastically. "It's delicious. The bad men only gave us bread and water."

"Well, you have some too, but we weren't going to give you only these." The rogue moved to sit near the boy and looked at his mabari. The huge dog was sitting beside Selek, panting happily as if to expect something. "Jep, heel. Stop begging for food."

"He can't eat?" Selek asked as Jep moved to lay down at his master's feet.

"He already had his meal, tonight. That dog is just a glutton."

"What's a gul.. glu... glutton?" The boy asked, trying to pronounce the word correctly.

"Well, someone, or an animal, who eats a lot of things... and not only because they're hungry, can be called a glutton." The rogue said with a smirk. "But Jep as another name: the wastebasket."

The dog huffed at the nickname, but it also caused Selek to giggle again. It was short and not very loud, but enough to make Hawke smiling again. Apparently he wasn't only one to be affected by this, due to the soft smile Bodhan was wearing. Sandal just grinned and stayed silent, while Orana filled Selek's glass with more fresh water. They fell in a comfortable silence after that, Selek's spoon hitting the plate each time he took a bit of his porridge being the only sound in the room.  
After a minute, Bodhan walked to Hawke.

"May I talk to you in private, messere?"

"Sure." Hawke stood up and left the room, following the dwarf until they both stood up in front of the fireplace. "So... what did you want to tell me?"

"I was wondering, messere... you said young Selek would only stay for tonight, right? You're aware that nowadays, things are still not going very well for a lot of people in Kirkwall, due to the Qunari attack. I was wondering what exactly you had in mind for the young boy."

"Well..." The rogue looked at the opened door leading to the living-room. "You remember my friend Sebastian? I'll go talk to him and see if the Chantry has a solution. I'm aware that Selek isn't the only child in need, but I still hope there's some way to help him."

"I understand." Bodhan bent down, took a log from the wood holder and put it among the dying embers of the fireplace. "And I hope you're right. But, if I may ask, how hopeful are you? I'm afraid the young boy will be sent to the orphanage. Maybe you'll have a few candidates willing for an adoption if you use your Champion status, but..."  
"I'd visit and make sure things are going well for him..." Hawke said, his voice trailing off as Bodhan used the bellows to revive the fire again. He wasn't too hopeful, to be honest. But he had to be. For Selek's sake. He let out a small sigh and shook his head. He didn't want to think about it right now. If he did, he had a feeling he wouldn't be able to get much rest. And it was already very late, probably close past midnight.

"Bodhan..." Hawke looked back at the elder dwarf. He might as well give them instructions for tomorrow. "Selek will need new clothes. I want you to buy some for him, tomorrow morning. Oh, and try to find some comfortable shoes too."

"Clothes and... shoes?" Bodhan looked at him with a bit of confusion.

"Well, I know that most elves normally don't wear shoes, but- oh, that reminds me! Fenris is here. He was the one at the door. He's now sleeping in my room. He's... not feeling well, so he mustn’t be disturbed."

"I see..." The dwarf nodded slowly as Hawke kept on talking. An amused smile slowly crept on his face.

"Anyway, you and Orana will check for Selek's cloth and shoe sizes, I don't want them to be too large or small. I'll bring Selek to bed after that, and..." The rogue finally stopped as he saw Bodhan chuckling. "Did I say something wrong?"

"Oh, no, messere." He said with a smile. "You just sound like a father who wants to spoil his child. I understand perfectly, though. You remind me of myself, after I found Sandal and- Oh! I better check what he's doing, now. I'll tell Orana about it."

Hawke just stared at him as he left the room, leaving the rogue alone. Him? Acting like he wanted to spoil his son? He chuckled a bit at this. An amusing thought, though unrealistic. Selek wasn't his son and would not be. His place was at the Chantry... to be adopted.  
He tried to imagine the elven child in a new family, with loving parents. Right where he should be. And not alone, in an orphanage, with other children who had suffered as well. He'd be alone, without anyone to really call him their son and giving him love.  
The thought made him frown. He wanted to make sure the child would be adopted, and not go through this. He closed his eyes, and imagined him wearing nice clothes, and not old dirty rags anymore. He'd be learning to read, helping the elven servant if he wanted to, before going outside to play with the family's mabari. Under the smiles of the dwarven servants and his father.

"Maker's breath..." The rogue groaned as he realized he was picturing the boy not staying with a new family, but here, at the Amell's mansion. It disturbed him. What was happening to him? Why did he keep on thinking about this? "I must _really_ be tired..."

He knew fatigue could make one delirious. Bodhan was wrong. The man just wanted to be nice to the child, and nothing else. There was nothing wrong with wanting to spoil someone. Even if it was usually his friends, when he paid them a round of drinks. Or Fenris, when he would bring him new books to train with.  
Thinking of his elven companion reminded him that he was still upstairs, sleeping off a night of drinks. He decided to go check on him, knowing Bodhan and Orana would take care of Selek for now.

He walked up the stairs and walked to his bedroom door before opening it faintly and leaning in. There was no sound. Fenris had to be asleep, still.  
He opened the door completely and stepped inside before walking to the bed. The elf hadn't moved since he left, still lying on his right side. Hawke couldn't help remembering that this was also how he had slept after their first and only night of passion. The difference being that the elf was naked and being hold against his chest.  
He stiffed a yawn, trying not to think about this night, before walking to the other side of the bed. After hesitating for a moment, he took off his shoes and laid down, being careful not to move the mattress too much, and not to be too close to Fenris. Fortunately, the elf didn't move. His breath was still steady and deep. Hawke couldn't help noticing that his face seemed a bit less flushed than before. He gently brought his hand to the warrior's face before touching his cheek. The heat wasn't so strong anymore.

He sighed faintly, slowly moving his hand away. He rarely had the occasion of seeing Fenris so relaxed. The exception might be during their reading lessons. His companion still had a lot to learn, but was making steady progress. He'd be less hesitant, though he'd still need help on long or complicated words. Hawke was always eager to help him to learn, once he had convinced the elf he wasn't doing it out of pity. The man enjoyed hearing Fenris talk, being so concentrated on something he had been forbidden to learn all his life. Things had been so tense between them since their first night, the lessons had helped to bring some sort of truce.  
Things still weren't the same as before, but it was better than nothing. The rogue would never have nothing at all. He wanted the elf by his side, even if it wouldn't be as a lover. He still had hope, that maybe one day it would change.

"It's official... I'm thinking way too much." he mumbled very lowly before yawning, as he watched the elf sleeping, curled around the extra blanket Hawke had given him. As he kept staring at him, he could feel himself relaxing a lot and slowly closed his eyes, failing to stay awake...


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long time since my last update... work and health problems, oh joy! :( The version of this chapter I put on the DA Kink was full of mistakes, so I corrected it. Remind me not to post anything if you can barely read because you're too tired. x.x

There were mornings when he would wake up with the sun shining on his face. It wasn't a bad feeling, but uncomfortable nonetheless when he'd open his eyes and get blinded by the sharp light. Other mornings, he'd hear the birds chirping or the rain pouring down outside. Living in a house with holes of large sizes on some parts of the roof, one would need to be deaf to not hear it.  
And there were mornings where he'd wake up with a massive headache, dry mouth and sore throat. On very rare occasions, but it could happen... like today.

"Hnn..." He mumbled, keeping his eyes shut. He felt like he had hit his head against a wall and eaten sand. It was a terrible feeling. He buried his head in the pillow, trying to recall the last events from last night: a fight with slavers, going to the Hanged Man with Varric for drinks... and the rest was mostly a blur. He hated not remembering, but he knew it was his own fault: he had obviously drunk too much. He usually could stand alcohol quite well. He must had gone over the edge.

He waited a moment for the pounding to stop, trying to hear something. He could hear the birds chirping, but faintly. It was also rather warm in the room, which was quite unusual. Especially at this time of the year. The mattress was very soft, unlike his own bed, and the blanket very... soft as well.  
And there was another sound in the room. A regular breathing. There was someone else here.

His eyes snapped open at this realization, and the first thing he saw was Hawke's face. The man was sleeping peacefully, not far from him, though not too close either.  
He sat up abruptly, but immediately regretted it as the sharp pounding returned with force. He hissed lowly, and put his hands on his head, waiting for it to go away. As he stayed in this position he finally realized that he wasn't in his mansion. There was a velvet red blanket wrapped on his thighs, and he was sitting on a large bed. Somehow, he had ended up in Hawke's bedroom, on his bed. He felt uneasy at the thought. Last time he had been here, he had been very sober and willing.  
More than willing.  
Pushing these thoughts out of his mind, he slowly raised his head and looked around the bedroom. He was quick at noticing that his great-sword and armor were beside Hawke's closet on the other side of the bed. The rogue was still sleeping, dressed in his finery clothes. He didn't wake up despite his abrupt movement and hissing. 

It was strange and confusing. He couldn't remember well what had happened last night. And his headache didn't help. He was almost certain that Hawke hadn't been at the inn. Or maybe he had come after he had gotten too drunk to remember... but why was he in his bedroom?  
Despite all those questions, he knew for sure that nothing indecent must have happened. He was dressed in his tunic and leggings, and Hawke had his clothes too. How come the man hadn't changed before going to sleep was confusing him a little. Did he fall asleep while making sure he was alright?  
He snorted at this. Why would he have done this? He was probably too tired and hadn't bothered to.

“This is... hnn...” He winced again as he felt a sharp pain in his head again. Hangover was clearly a horrible thing to wake up to. He needed fresh air. And water. His throat was so dry that it hurt just to say a few words. Slowly, he removed the blanket and stood up. He had to do it very slowly, though. His vision was now troubled and he felt like he'd fall at any moment if he was careless.  
For a moment, he stood still, looking at Hawke warily as if the man would wake up at any moment. But the human seemed to still be asleep. There was no faking involved. He felt uneasy, remembering what had happened last year. How he had also woken up before him and got dressed, before waiting... He almost felt like he was doing it again: leaving Hawke behind.  
He frowned at this. He was simply looking forward to fresh air and water. Nothing else. Beside, he needed to know what had happened yesterday and how he had ended up here. 

After a minute, he slowly started walking to the door, trying not to make any noise. When he heard a loud sigh, he froze and turned around, thinking the rogue had woken up. Fortunately, it was not the case. The man had just moved in his sleep.  
Fenris finally reached the door of the bedroom and opened slowly, wincing at the small noise hissing door it was making. Almost there...

Carefully, he stepped out and started to close the door when he heard something close to him. Like small footsteps. With a frown, he moved ahead and stopped as a sudden bark came from his right. He winced faintly at the noise and turned to scowl at the mabari, who was looking at him with curiosity.

“Hush... Hawke is still sleeping.” he whispered to him. The dog just whined questioningly and looked behind him. He saw someone coming out of another room. A very small person. “Who...”

Daylight had started to break through the windows, so it wasn't difficult to see that this person was a child. A child dressed in a shirt that was obviously too big for him. Confusion took place for a moment, before the child turned and looked up at him. Fenris finally recognized him. It was the young slave from yesterday. But what was he doing here? And dressed like this?  
He didn't have time to ask any question. As soon as the child saw him, his eyes widened in fear and he let out a high pitched scream, making the warrior hissing in pain as he felt like the sound was tiring his head apart. And the mabari starting to bark loudly didn't help at all.

********

_More then once did Hawke dream of his childhood. Of his parents, and his younger siblings. Sounds of distant laughter, sight of him working in the fields, while his father was training Bethany to control her magic... Carver would help their mother with making dinner, though complaining about not doing harder cores like his old brother... Dreams of a happy family, broken apart years later by death and chantry laws.  
He missed this feeling. He missed them all._

_But this dream was different. He was standing in front of the stairs, looking down at the lightened fireplace. His mabari was here, laying down in front of it... and Selek was there too, petting him. His dog looked up and barked loudly, before playfully licking the boy's cheek, making the boy giggle. The sounds seemed to echo in the room.  
Hawke tried to call for him, but no sound came out of his mouth. But the boy did look up at him with a smile.  
"Papa!" The child's voice echoed in the room. But as soon as he heard this, the boy's face changed from happiness to terror, looking at something behind Hawke. And when the rogue turned around to see what was scaring him, he heard Selek screaming._

********

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!"

Such screaming could be coming from a damsel in distress, or a child. Either way, it was loud enough for Hawke to wake up. He sat up abruptly, his eyes wide open. For a moment, he wondered what had happened, when he heard other noises.  
Little footsteps rushing, barking from a dog, the slam of a door, _his_ bedroom door, and a body slamming against it, followed by a curse.  
"Damn it!" Fenris.  
He quickly looked on his left and noticed that, indeed, the elf wasn't there. For how long had he been awaken? Quickly, he got up from his bed and rushed to the bedroom door before opening it. It hadn't been a very good idea as he saw the elf falling backward on the floor, holding his head. The warrior had been sitting on the floor, his back against the door. "Fenris?!"

"Not so loud..." he hissed, removing his hands and glaring up at him. "Too much noise."

For a moment, Hawke just blinked stupidly at him before bending down, putting his arm under Fenris's knees and the other around his back, before lifting him up. The elf was groaning, but he suspected it was more from his hangover than from this treatment.

"Stay in bed, Fenris." Hawke said softly, knowing talking in a normal tone would add to the pain. He was also surprised to discover that Fenris was rather light. Had he been eating normally lately? But the rogue didn't take his time to ask or to enjoy the situation as he quickly stepped to his bed and put him down on it. "I'll get you something." 

The warrior just mumbled something incoherent, his eyes shut with a deep frown. His hand was on the right side of his head, probably where the pounding due to his headache was the worst. The joy of hangover...  
The rogue stood up and left the room, just as he heard noises coming from the stairs.

"Messere? Is everything alright?" Bodhan and Orana were walking up to him, both dressed normally. They were always the first ones in the house to be awake, in order to prepare breakfast. "We heard screaming. Was it Selek?"

"Yes." Hawke hadn't seen him, but he was the only one who could have screamed like that. "I... think he had a nightmare. But Fenris is awake too. Can you please bring him some water?"

"I'll do it, Master!" Orana said before going down the stairs. Bodhan just smiled.

"I'll have breakfast ready soon. Oh, and I didn't forget about the errands for our little guest." Hawke thanked him before walking down to the guest bedroom. The door was still opened, and sunlight was coming from the window, lightening the small room. Hawke could see a big ball under the blankets. And a gasp coming from them as he entered the room.

"Selek, it's me." He said softly. Slowly, he saw the blankets being removed and Selek looked at him timidly, his hands still holding them up to his chin. "Don't worry, you have nothing to fear."

"Is... the bad man gone?" He asked.

"Did you have a nightmare?" He asked tentatively. Selek shook his head. "What happened?"

"The man with... the white hair and markings. I saw him. I was scared." Hawke was about to ask him what he was talking about, but stopped himself. A man with white hair and markings? Only Fenris matched the description. That was when he remembered. Fenris had almost attacked the child at the warehouse, thinking it had been a slaver. "Is he gone?"

"Oh boy..." Hawke sighed, before walking over and sitting next to the child. Selek kept his blankets around him, but didn't look afraid of him. "Selek, it's... You saw Fenris. And he's not a bad man. Not at all."

"But..."

"Listen, little one. Last night, Fenris thought you were a slaver before he saw you were not." He explained. "He could never hurt you. He used to be a slave as well, you know."

"He... was?" Selek now looked curious. "But... did his master die? Slaves don't have swords. We're not allowed to."

"He... was a different kind of slave." Hawke said. He didn't want to tell Selek everything about Fenris, but just enough to explain that there was nothing to fear. "And... well, just know that Fenris is a good man, who hates slavers just like me. He's not very talkative, but once you get to know him, you see that he really is a good person."

"Oh..." The boy stayed silent for a moment, looking at his hands. With a gentle smile, Hawke reached and ruffled his black hair.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked, trying to change the subject. Selek looked back at him and nodded.

"Yes, puppy stayed with me last night." He answered, before looking at the mabari, who had just joined them. The dog barked, wagging his tail happily. "I felt safe."

"I'm sure you did..." Considering the paw prints on the blankets, Hawke wondered if his dog had rather tried to find an excuse to sleep on a bed. But at least, the boy didn't seem to have had nightmares. Considering what had happened last night, it was almost like a little miracle for the rogue. He didn't mind at all, though.  
He felt a little weight on his thigh and noticed the boy had laid down and using it with a pillow. "Still sleepy?"

"Mmm..." Selek just snuggle before yawning and closing his eyes. Hawke felt a strange warmth in his chest as he watched him. He wasn't sure if it was the obvious trust Selek seemed to have put in him or just the fact that he did look adorable like this.  
For a moment, he just looked at the child, gently stroking his black hair, before he heard soft footsteps coming closer.

“Master.” He looked up and saw Orana, looking hesitant. She was also talking lowly, probably to avoid waking the boy up. “I gave water to your friend, but he still isn't feeling well.” 

“I'm not surprised...” Considering the amount of alcohol he had drunk last night, Hawke had expected this.

“I advised him to sleep some more, Master.” Hawke didn't really believe that he'd be able to sleep again. Not without taking some medicine first, at least. He looked down at Selek and gently lift him up before standing up and laying him down on the bed, resting his head on the pillow. The boy frowned faintly, gripping the man's clothes with weak hands. Hawke looked at him with a smile, before whispering softly. “Selek, I have to go to my room. Just beside yours. Sleep, still.”

“Mmm...” The boy snuggled into the pillow as Hawke gently put the blankets over him. Quite an adorable sight, even if it was the last time he'd see it. He'd need to bring him to the Chantry later.  
The thought made him frown a bit. He wasn't sure why, but he still felt disturbed at the idea. The Chantry was a good place to seek help, and yet he felt nervous at leaving Selek there.  
He looked down at Jep, who was sitting beside Orana. The mabari started stepping to the bed, but Hawke held out his hand.

“Boy, you can stay and watch, but you stay off the bed.” The mabari whined in disappointment, but his master would have none of it. The rogue tutted at him before leaving the room with Orana. “Maker, that dog...”

“Can I get you something, Master?” The elf servant asked, looking at him expectantly. “I didn't dare waking you up last night. So, I let you be and put Selek in bed myself. He seemed happy.”

“I bet he was... you did well, Orana.” The man answered with a smile. “You can start preparing breakfast for Selek, but let him sleep a bit more. And tell Bodhan to go and buy what I asked for as soon as he can.”

“Yes, Master.” She said with a nod before going down the stairs. Now, he was alone again, with Selek sleeping in the guest room with his mabari, and Fenris in his, having to deal with his hangover.  
Time to see the... _adult_ elf.

********

“Fenris?” Hawke said as he came into the bedroom. Fenris was still there, sitting on the edge of the bed and holding his head in both hands. Hawke walked pass him to his bedside table before opening the drawer and taking a small vial full of green liquid. "You have to take this. You're not going to make it better if you don't.”

“Not so loud...” The elf groaned, glaring up at him. His face wasn't flushed anymore, but he was sweating and pale. Hawke cleared his throat and whispered.

“Sorry about that.” He walked over, sat beside him. He hold out the small vial to Fenris, but the elf didn't react. He just stared at him. “Come on, you have to drink this. You'll feel better, trust me. I don't really want to see you throwing up all over the room...”

For a moment, the warrior didn't say anything. He just lowered his head toward the vial, his face twitching faintly. There was no doubt that his headache was still strong. Finally, he reached and took the potion from Hawke, uncorking it and swallowing the liquid in quick gulps. He started coughing loudly after that.  
"It's... filthy!"

"Well, potions are rarely tasty." The rogue said, patting Fenris's back until the coughing stopped. His hand remained on the elf's back, gently rubbing it. “I remember when I first took one. Anders told me that just the taste would be a lesson to remember. He did leave a few vials, still.”

“The mage... made these potions for you?” The elf said, frowning at him.

“He did. My knowledge in potion is very... limited.” The rogue said with a smile. The elf just snorted and looked away before closing his eyes. The potion was very effective, but would still take a few minutes to act, so Hawke just kept on rubbing the elf's back. He was actually surprised that his companion didn't try to pull away. Probably because it did feel good.  
With his habit of daily training, Hawke had learned years ago to take care of his body and make sure not to be stiff all over the following days. He knew fairly well where touches could feel good. The elven body wasn't so different from human's, despite the slender frame. Fenris would feel even better if he didn't have his tunic on, but the rogue knew it would be risky to try and push his luck. 

“Hawke...” He was brought back out of his thoughts as he heard the elf talking again. Or rather sighing. The warrior really looked less tense now. He wasn't frowning anymore, and still didn't try to put the rogue's hand away. Hawke couldn't help smiling a bit and decided to scoot a little closer. Not close enough for their thighs to touch, but enough for him to see that Fenris still looked tired.

“Fenris, do you want to sleep still? Or maybe have a bath?” He proposed, still keeping his voice low. The elf opened his eyes and looked at him, blinking. For a moment, he didn't say anything, he just looked at him with his wide green eyes. “Or... something else?”

His hand stopped moving, still touching Fenris's lower back. Hawke was patiently waiting for the elf to say something, but started feeling a bit nervous. His former lover was not the most talkative person in the world, but his silence and staring was making him feel uncomfortable. Part of him was very tempted to simply lean and claimed his lips. He also knew that it could drive the elf away. But he wanted this.  
So badly...

“Messere! Breakfast is ready!” Bodhan's voice made them both jumped sightly and looking at the door. The dwarf came in the bedroom and looked at both of them. “Oh, I'm sorry. Did I interrupt anything?”

“No, no, nothing.” After a moment, Hawke stood up and walked over, forcing a smile. He was a bit grateful for the interruption. He'd have probably given into his desire and who knew what would have happened next.  
He hated being so unsure of the consequences. Love was really a terrible affair.  
“I'll be downstairs shortly. Tell Orana to have a bath prepared for Fenris.”

“Sure thing. I'll go with Sandal get the clothes for Selek, if that's alright with you.”

“Perfect. Thank you, Bodhan.” The dwarf nodded and left, leaving Hawke and Fenris alone again.

“A bath?” Turning around, he saw his companion standing up. He wasn't wincing much more, which means the potion was already starting to work. “Hawke, this is not necessary.”

“It is.” The rogue replied, waving his hand. “You have no hot water at your house. You may as well make use of it here.”

“Cold water doesn't bother me, I'm used to it.”

“Please, Fenris.” The elf frowned a bit, but Hawke would not give up. “I'm not ordering you around, I just want to make you feel better. That's what friends do.”

None of them could say that they were the best of friends, but it didn't really matter to the rogue. Despite their regular arguments, they were always at each other side, even after what had happened between them one year ago. Hawke wanted to be there for him, even if it wasn't as a lover...

"Selek?" Fenris tilted his head faintly as he spoke up again. “Is it...?”

"Ah, yes, it's the child's name. I kept him for the night, but I'll bring him to the Chantry today." He explained "I couldn't exactly left him on the streets."

"Of course..." Fenris trailed off, looking aside. "But you heard him earlier... he's still a terrified child. Do you think that leaving him at the Chantry is a good idea?"

"These people will know what to do, and, well... I took care of him, and I'll get him some new clothes before we go. That's the least I can do, and he seems to trust me. He'll understand once I explain." Hawke ruffled his hair, sighing. He should tell Fenris what had happened earlier. "But Fenris, the reason he was scared earlier is that... you gave him quite a fright last night. I had to explain that there was nothing to fear."

"I know that, I haven't forgotten." The warrior replied, frowning at him "And I regret it. But the fact is... He's been a slave, at the hands of humans. And if he does trust you, then you're probably the only one. Leaving him with other humans he doesn't know will be problematic."

"... That's a good point." Hawke couldn't deny Fenris's logic, but he didn't want to be so pessimistic.  
"But Sebastian will be there. I'm sure I can get him to take care of Selek for a moment."

"And for how long? This child's future will remain uncertain." The elf insisted, making Hawke frowning as well. "I'm merely stating facts, Hawke. Being hopeful won't help."

"You're not helping either by saying such things." The warrior crossed his arms, but said nothing. "Selek's future is not decided." 

"I don't see how different it can be, considering he has no one left. He has lost everything as a slave, how can you expect him to still have hope for a better life?"

"And what about you? You were a slave, and you're here, alive and breathing. You sound like you don't have much hope for your own life." Comparing Fenris to Selek might not have been the brightest thing to do to calm the elf down, but Hawke didn't regret his words. He hated to have arguments with Fenris, but he held his ground, looking at Fenris in defiance. The elf glared and walked over until he was in front of him.

"It has nothing to do with _me_! Are you such a fool to believe otherwise? He's a defenseless _child_ , while I've been trained to fight for as long as I can remember! We have nothing in common."

"Of course you have things in common. Selek trusts me, just like you do... or am I wrong?" The rogue replied, still keeping his voice calm. Not because Selek was sleeping and the door of his room was opened, but also because he didn't want to yell at Fenris. He wanted him to calm down. "You're both free from slavery, and I'll make sure it stays that way. Or am I also wrong to care?"

He got no answer for a moment, but Fenris's face was unreadable. He just stared at him for a moment, before lowering his gaze. There was still a frown, but not as deep.

"You're a very stubborn man, Hawke. It is... irritating, at times." He says lowly. He didn't say anything else, but the rogue didn't really mind. He just didn't want to argue with the elf. No matter if the elf didn't believe him or not.

"You know me, Fenris. I like to drive people mad." His attempt at lightening the mood seemed to work, as Fenris's mouth curled faintly. It wasn't a real smile, but still better than nothing. Hawke couldn't help smiling gently in return. "Just trust me, Fenris. I'll do whatever is best for Selek."

The faint smile was gone, much to his chagrin, but at least, the elf wasn't glaring anymore. He just sighed in resignation. Hawke didn't like this much, though. Anyone could see that Fenris was affected by Selek's situation, but something seemed out of place. They had killed slavers and saved a few slaves before, but his companion seemed particularly affected by this young one. Was it because Selek was a child?  
Gently, Hawke put his hand under Fenris's chin and lift his head so that he could look at him.

"Fenris... are you alright? Is there something you're not telling me?" The elf quickly looked away before gently pushing Hawke out of the way.

"I don't even know myself." The warrior replied without turning around. "I... will check and see if my bath is ready, if you don't mind."

"... Of course. Be my guest." The rogue replied, watching him leave. The elf hadn't said anything, but something was clearly up. He slowly started pacing in his room, thinking. His behavior actually remembered him of Bodhan. Not the way he acted toward him, but the meaning behind the words: Selek's future was more than uncertain. The fact that he was a child was even more important. Adult free slaves could survive by themselves, but not without major difficulties. A child? It was even less likely without any help. But Selek wouldn't be alone. People would watch over him. Sebastian would surely tell him not to worry...

He stopped pacing as he heard a dog whining at the door. Looking up, he saw Jep sitting there, Selek at his side, wiping tears from his face. "Hey... what's wrong? Did you have a bad dream?"

"Yes..." Selek said, stepping over, still dressed in Hawke's old shirt. "I saw the bad men trying to catch me and I... heard Mama telling me to run. I cried and woke up. I'm sorry."

"Selek, come here." If there was one thing that Hawke had never forgotten in his years in Lothering, it was how to comfort his younger siblings after they had had a nightmare or during violent thunderstorms. He sat down on his bed and scooped the elven child up, making him sitting on his thighs. The child immediately snuggled against his chest, seeking warmth and comfort. The rogue couldn't help smiling and held him close. "There's nothing to be sorry about. It's alright." 

"I don't want to be scared." Selek said, gripping the man's shirt. After a moment, he looked up at the rogue. He was obviously sad and tired. "But..."

"Don't worry, I'm going to help you." Hawke said, smiling down at him as he gently wiped the tear streams from the boy's flushed face. "I know good people who will take care of you, and you won't be scared anymore."

"Good people?" Selek repeated with a yawn. "Who?"

"I'll bring you to them. One of my best friends is among them."

"But you..."

"I'll be there, of course." The boy didn't answer, he simply snuggled back against him before closing his eyes. His short nap had been interrupted earlier by his nightmare, and Hawke's chest seemed comfortable enough for him. The man didn't really mind. He actually felt some joy at seeing Selek like this. He gently rocked back and forth, gently brushing his black locks, as his mabari laid down on the floor in front of the fireplace.

Selek was an adorable child. Yet, he was fragile, having just lost his mother and been saved from slavers.  
He remembered how his nights were sometimes plagued with visions of his mother dying in his arms. He could still hear her last words, telling him how she loved him and was proud of her strong little boy... The memories remained painful. Thanks the Maker his friends had been there for him, all of them trying to comfort him in different ways. Most surprisingly, the one who managed to make him laugh again had been Fenris.  
The elf didn't know much about comforting people. He had instead sat silently by his side, listening to Hawke, each time he had felt the need to talk. Or he had simply read to him, wanting to distract the man... well, at least, trying to. At that time, the elf hadn't been skilled enough to read without much difficulty, and used to hesitate a lot before managing to pronounce the words correctly. He had made a lot of mistakes, to the point of making Hawke laughing unexpectedly one night after pronouncing the word 'fuck' instead of 'fork'. The rogue hadn't been able to stop himself. Evidently, the warrior hadn't appreciated being laughed at, but his glare had slowly turned into a small smile, much to the rogue's surprise.

 _"At least, you're smiling again."_ Fenris had simply said, before trying to read again. It had been the first time Hawke had laughed since his mother's death. And the only time Hawke had laughed during their lessons as well. The incident had been embarrassing for both men, but also worth it.  
He knew the effort the warrior had done, considering how difficult it had been for him to read out loud without asking Hawke for help. By just being at Hawke's side, he had helped him a lot to go through his mother's death. Somehow, he hoped he'd be able to help Selek going through this... before he brought him to the Chantry.

He looked back down at the boy, who had fallen asleep again. It still surprised him to see how easily relaxed Selek was around him. But then again, since he had saved him last night, he had done a lot to have the boy feeling better. He knew he could never take a mother's place, but at least, Selek had started healing already.  
Hawke remembered how Aveline had told him that the other slaves were dead. Even if the City Guards were going to investigate the place like she had told him, the rogue doubted they would find more survivors. Even Selek's mother.  
He'd still come and see her today. Just in case...

"Mmm..." ,He looked down as he felt the boy moving faintly. He was asleep, but mumbling very lowly. One word. "Mama..."

He didn't sound desperate. In fact, he looked very relaxed. Hawke wasn't sure if the body heat was giving Selek this effect, or simply the feeling of security.  
Either way, as he looked at him, there was one word pending on his lips. One he had heard in his dream...

_Papa._

Swallowing thickly, he shook his head and turned his head to look at the closet where were his armor and double blades.  
He really needed to get to the Chantry as soon as possible...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the very late update. :( At least, we're close to the moment Hawke will make an important decision... There will be more Fenris, a little visit to the Chantry and... well, more to come! :)


End file.
